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Subject:history
Time:09:00 pm
Current Mood:interested
History really does have a way of repeating itself sometimes.
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Subject:un-dwelling
Time:03:54 am
I feel.

I feel a lot of things.

And I also feel like I spend a lot of time trying not to feel the way I do.

But I'm not sure how much longer I can last

censoring myself so you can be at ease

It's not always easy

I feel.
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Subject:Old and Random
Time:08:27 pm
Just old and random journal entries that I wanted to save somewhere other than myspace:

Thursday, August 04, 2005
B-O--R--I-N-G
Uugh. I feel as though my Myspace is so so so boring. I definetly need to get some new pictures or something. Blehh today was the least interesting day of my life. Ew. Sat around lil' miss Jennifers house from sometime around 9:30 am till' now . . . which would be 8:55. My eyes are going to fall out if I stay on this computer any longer. Eh, theres nothing better to do.
well . . . summer is going by so fast that I can hardly believe we are already into August. Its amazing how quickly time flies. Kinda seems like just yesterday a whole gaggle of us were tearing up Lazer Gate in celebration of my ' sweet sixteen ' . I'm only weeks away from adding another year under my belt. I know I know so what its only 17 . . . but the way I look at it, it's the oldest I've ever been.

Soccer has begun . Twice a week for an hour and a half the group of us gather together in hopes to better prepare ourselves for the upcomming season. And once again I am reminded of my age. I never would have thought I would have to try to earn the respect of younger players as a captain. There is a lot more responsibilty resting on me this year . . . and as cumbersome as it may be, I will not let the weight of it all break me.

My anticipation of this school year is actually quite unexpected. I'm ready to show everyone what I'm made of and that I am just as capable of getting A's as any other Honors level student. I have been slacking more and more throughout my highschool career but now's the time to pick up the slack. I can't afford to slip anymore. I know Im better than that.



Okay well now that Ive driven you all to insanity with my pep talk to myself ( lol ) I'll give your eyes a rest.



Sunday, October 30, 2005
SRA soccer
Senior Night was toootally badass. Thanks to everyone who put everything together. Its so crazy to think that we've got a total of about 3 possible games left of this season. I don't want to leave this team!! Everyone always talks about how quick the time goes, but I never listened lol. A message to all underclassmen:



Enjoy every moment you have on the SRA soccer team! Becuase before you know it, you'll be graduating too.



I know in some weird way I'm gonna miss the 12 minute run, suicides, 100s, and SPEED LADDERS!! ::cries:: haha.



This is going to sound selfish, but bear with me. Its really tough to imagine the team without this year's seniors. We were there for Dave, then George (i miss him), Coach Alves, and then finally Coach Jeff. And reguardless if all of us maybe can't score a goal from outside the 18 I'd like to think of the c/o 2006 as some of the hardest working players. Many of us started from scratch and had never played soccer in our lives before freshman or sophmore year. And I have to give credit to Kk, George and coach Alves in my sophmore year. If it weren't for them I would have never ever stepped into goal and tried it out. It's totally bizzare that now I'm doing my best to pass on everything I know to someone younger who can keep the net clear when I'm gone.



I know our team will continue to have winning seasons due to the fact that the underclassmen KICK ASS. We have enourmous amounts of talent on this team. So Lady Saints . . . let's put all the peices together and win the division this year!! That would be the best soccer memory we could ever make!



I love my team...



- Katie
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Subject:Self-worth
Time:10:48 am
I've been a little down in the dumps.

However, I'm self-examining now and I'm finding that ... you know what? Everything will be okay.

I've honestly got some incredible people in my life.

And aside from them, I have myself.

Everyone has little nit-picky things they might not like about themselves.

But I'm actually pretty happy with who I am, what I stand for, and what I bring to the table every day.

I don't know where I'll be 5 years from now, nor do I really know where I want to be.

What I do know is that I want to continue to count my reasons to smile every day.

People may come in and out of your life, and true friends are probably the most important people you'll meet.

But being your own friend, cheerleader, and support is so intensely important.

Having a dog in your life doesn't hurt either :)

Peace.Love.

-Katie
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Time:12:22 am
fuck
alcohol.
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Subject:reflecting
Time:07:34 pm
decision making process-


calculate:

one's own happiness (positive on negatively affected) + happiness of others (positively or negatively affected)

the action which results in the most happiness all around is the best.

...but what exactly is that action?
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Subject:quickswitch
Time:07:23 pm
Sometimes things don't go my way.

Sometimes its hard for me to handle that.

I don't deal well with being ignored.

I don't deal well with constantly working around other people's schedules.

Just because I'll internalize things before I take it out on you doesn't give you the right to constantly overlook my feelings.

Maybe I am too good.

But I know all it will take is a couple of things to go right and I'll drop it immediately. Its hard for me to stay mad.

But you know what?

Im mad.

And you know what else?

I wish I could explain to you why.
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Subject:what??
Time:04:05 pm
Where the heck did this come from???

...Seriously?

I can't read minds.
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Subject:Meditation
Time:08:24 am
I seriously want to learn how to meditate or something of the sort. It'd be nice to be able to just take a time out from the day and put my focus on something else.

I already had a dream about being late for the first practice of preseason lol. However, I'm seriously not worried about it at this point. I'm doing what I can to be in the best physical condition and going in with a "Do your best" kind of mentality. Whatever happens, happens and for now I'm just taking it day by day.
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Subject:My own place
Time:09:56 pm
I am getting really excited about having an apartment.

I have to get better at organizing and chores and whatnot, but it'll all come together.

It's kinda shitty for soccer but it'll work out.

I'm most excited to have a queen sized bed :)
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